If you’re older than seven, you’re probably taller than me. Ironically, always being the shorter one has given me some legitimate advantages. For starters, my shorter vantage point has forced me to look up to others my entire life. While it can be intimidating, even today, this permanent physical posture has taught me that the most powerful relational posture I can have with others is to look up to them rather than down on them.

Learning to expand my view of others has been the most potent lesson in my life. It’s allowed me to see the world through a more cooperative lens.

But we have to peel back the layers of those stories to see that neither the fighter nor the overcomer ever does it alone. And we have to be willing to acknowledge that a hero having help doesn’t detract from the beauty and inspiration of what he or she has done.

Unfortunately, that’s exactly what happened on a massive scale.

For those of us living in America, independence is part of our country’s brand. Every Fourth of July, we celebrate it. Our nation’s history carries stories of individuals who stood for what they believed in, resisted challengers, and won the day on the back of their own resources. At least that’s how we characterize them in many books and movies. The reality we can miss in the story of America is that we didn’t seek independence from one another; we sought a new, united opportunity to thrive together. Seen in that light, independence is something worth fighting for.

But it’s not mutually exclusive of interdependence. That’s where we get off track as adults.

Asking for Help is a Corporate Faux Pas

At Caterpillar, I wanted to show my bosses and coworkers that I belonged not only as a teammate but also as a person who was worthy of their trust. My inclination was to let my work speak for itself and to get the job done, no questions asked. But this inclination battled against a higher principle: that asking for help was a strength, not a weakness. The trouble was that in my new environment, asking for help was not necessarily seen as a strength. Unfortunately, it rarely is.

In places such as shops and supermarkets, asking someone to reach a can of beans for me or grab a shirt off the rack rarely rubs people the wrong way, particularly in places where employees are paid to serve the customer. However, in a corporate environment, there are often unspoken rules about being the “squeaky wheel” or the “weak link.” Inside the muscular walls of Caterpillar, everyone worked to repel those labels. And trust me: I didn’t want anyone to think those things of me either. I also knew I’d need help more often than most, even if it was to reach a file folder from the supply closet. I hoped my work overpowered any notion that I was a weak link.

Sometimes success takes being the giver. Sometimes success takes being the receiver. We live in a world where the givers get the accolades. I’ve learned that while it might feel better to give than to receive, it takes more strength to ask for help than to give it. This is especially the case in the working world, where we are expected to own our work and not disrupt others from theirs. I certainly understand the spirit behind the expectation, but it often goes too far and prohibits us from achieving our highest effectiveness together.

I’m a bit of a prepper. Not like “bunker in the woods” prepper, but certainly “canned food for a few months” prepper. You could say it’s because I lack trust in people and systems outside of my control. Sometimes I wear my independence like a badge, proud to display the quality and honored when someone describes me as such. Other times, I wish I was better at asking for help, especially in the workplace.

Are you the employee who can’t seem to ever complete a to-do list because for every item you check off, you add three more? Do you feel a twinge of imposter syndrome when you encounter a new task? You probably research the subject matter for hours, or even days so you can conquer it and achieve some futile victory. But then you realize that you wasted time and resources to do so when you could have received help from someone already imbued with the requisite knowledge. As Sullivan has learned, and many of us need to recognize, asking for help is often more productive than going at a project alone. How will you start working towards an interdependence in your professional life? Share your plans in the comments! ~ HarperCollins Leadership Essentials